Out and Back

Congratulations, Al Gore

Finally, Al has won something that George W. Bush and the Supreme Court can't steal from him -- I couldn't be more pleased for him and for the cause of advancing awareness of climate change.

Excuse me while I throw things...

I was dismayed yesterday to learn that the U.S. Supreme Court had ruled against the plaintiff (and the EEOC, I might add) in this case.  Here's the gist: according to Title VII of the Civil Rights Act, employees who experience discrimination in the work place are required to file suit within 180 days.  The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has argued over the years that "each paycheck that reflects the initial discrimination is itself a discriminatory act that resets the clock on the 180-day period[.]"  Today, the Supreme Court effectively told the EEOC to stick that interpretation where the sun don't shine.  So now employees can't sue for pay discrimination more than 180 days after the discrimination allegedly occurred... which means that employers are going to get away with continuing to pay women and minorities less than their white male counterparts and employees who are experiencing discrimination will have an even harder time getting their cases heard.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg opened a can of dissenting whoop-ass today, though, reading her dissenting opinion from the bench, which doesn't happen very often.  According to the New York Times article:

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said the majority opinion “overlooks common characteristics of pay discrimination.” She said that given the secrecy in most workplaces about salaries, many employees would have no idea within 180 days that they had received a lower raise than others.

An initial disparity, even if known to the employee, might be small, Justice Ginsburg said, leading an employee, particularly a woman or a member of a minority group “trying to succeed in a nontraditional environment” to avoid “making waves.” Justice Ginsburg noted that even a small differential “will expand exponentially over an employee’s working life if raises are set as a percentage of prior pay."

Rock on, Justice Ginsburg.  And props to Justices Souter, Stephens, and Breyer for not having their heads up their asses.

In April, the American Association of University Women released the findings of a study it conducted over the course of several years about the pay gap.  Their findings?  The pay gap is real and it gets worse for women the longer they are in the work force.  You can read more about it here.  Then write to your elected officials and tell them to get off their butts and support the Paycheck Fairness Act and the Fair Pay Act.

Dreadful

As much as I would like to ignore the news most days (too damn depressing), I usually tune in to some news outlet or another at some point during the day.  I like to have at least a vague idea of what is going on in the world, in the country, and in my little corner of South Carolina.

Sometimes, though, in the quest to be informed, I hear news stories that I wish I could go back and "un-hear."  Such was the case this week when I heard about Tara Grant, the Michigan wife, businesswoman, and mother of two who was strangled and dismembered by her husband in early February.  (He was arrested over the weekend and the big news yesterday was that he had confessed.)

We'll probably never know why Tara's husband, Stephen, killed her... police said that they had argued shortly before her death about her frequent business trips... but I have a hard time believing that that was the only motive.  At any rate, it will take someone with more psychiatric prowess than I have to see into the mind and motivation of a man like that.

I suppose the one thing I've taken away from this tragedy is that we don't know our loved ones nearly as well as we think we do.  If someone had asked Tara on her wedding day if she thought her husband would kill her in the future, she probably would have been horrified at such a suggestion.  It's like what the neighbors say when they find out they've been living next to a serial killer for years: "Oh, he seemed like such a nice person.  Quiet, kept to himself, never caused anybody any trouble."  I guess we never really know.

You go, girl!

How cool is this?

A Komodo dragon named Flora is about to hatch seven babies.  The interesting part?  She laid and fertilized the eggs all on her own, with no male involvement.

Kind of cool right before Christmas, isn't it?  The whole "immaculate conception" thing and all.

Anyway, I got a big kick out of the story when I read it.  The Komodo dragon is one of my favorite animals.  I've always wanted to have one for a pet (yes, I know they're vicious, stinky, full of bacteria, and impossible to keep as pets, but I still think they are way cool.)

And on an unrelated note: Happy Anniversary to my parents, L & B.  Congrats on 37 years together.

SEX! XXX! PREMARITAL! HOT! LIVE NUDE GIRLS!

I saw the news item yesterday about the latest study that shows that nine out of ten Americans have had premarital sex.  Fascinating.  I realize it's only one study and the abstinence-only crowd is already going bananas trying to disprove the findings, but I think the implications are rather interesting in any event.

I've always thought that Americans' attitudes toward sex in general were a little weird.  On the one hand, the media throws sex at us right and left.  It's in our television commercials, our TV shows, our music, and our evening news.  Hell, you can even visit blogs like Perez Hilton and view paparazzi photographs of Britney Spears' or Lindsay Lohan's panty-less crotches as they clamber from their limos in an unladylike fashion.  (Even I will admit to finding Perez Hilton delightful, in that twisted, voyeuristic way... it's a guilty pleasure and a fascinating study for my inner anthropologist.  But I wasn't terribly interested in looking at Britney's hoo-ha.) 

On the other hand, though, I think Americans are also really uptight about sex.  We see Janet Jackson's boobie at the Super Bowl and our collective panties get all in a bunch.  It's a boobie, people!  I saw more ta-ta on billboards for shower gel in Italy, for heaven's sake.  Puritanical groups call for abstinence-only education, girls and women get called sluts or worse for enjoying sex or having (gasp!) multiple partners, and despite the prevailing popular culture and media, we're all taught that sex is a big no-no.  (Lights out and missionary, and only then after you're married.)

I just think it's weird.  We could all stand to relax a little more... if we ease up on both the overly sexed-up media and the overly puritanical attitudes toward sex, I think we'd be better off.  Sex is something that some people do.  Period.  (Both before and after marriage, apparently.)  As my college Religion professor put it one afternoon in our Christian Ethics class, "Orgasms feel GOOD!"

Duh.

Lighten up, people.

Changes afoot in Coney Island

The rumblings of change in Coney Island are getting louder.  According to this article in the New York Daily News, the new owner of the properties along West 12th Street is notifying tenants that their leases are up and that it's time to vacate.  Fortunately (so far) it looks like places like Ruby's and Cha Cha's will be staying put.

I am holding my breath to see what is going to happen.  The Coney Island Development Corporation has an exciting and potentially very positive strategic plan for revitalizing the area, and my only hope is that the revitalization will both honor the history of Coney Island and embrace a more positive future.  I fear a massive gentrification of the area, to be honest, but I am more hopeful than anything that a balance can be struck that honors the wishes, expectations, etc. of ALL of Coney Island's stakeholders.

I just can't imagine going to Coney Island for a long weekend at a fancy spa hotel type place, nor can I imagine it all glitzed out like Las Vegas or Atlantic City.  It was the Atlantic City of its day back around the turn of the century, yes, but that was before neon lights and all the crazy stuff you see in those kinds of towns today.  Coney Island in its heyday was still beautifully ephemeral.  Everything was made of spit and cardboard and a stray spark from bad electrical wiring or an unextinguished cigarette could turn the whole amusement area into a pile of ashes in minutes.  It has always been a place for entrepreneurs and prospectors, from Fred Thompson to George C. Tilyou all the way up to Dick Zigun and the Coney Island USA crew.  It will never be a place for chain stores and big box retailers... it's for the little guy, and it should stay that way.

Keep your fingers crossed.

Great article

I found this article by Bob Herbert via feministing.com, and thought I would link to it from my blog, too, because it's extremely well-written and worth reading.  Here is an excerpt:

In the recent shootings at an Amish schoolhouse in rural Pennsylvania and a large public high school in Colorado, the killers went out of their way to separate the girls from the boys, and then deliberately attacked only the girls.

Ten girls were shot and five killed at the Amish school. One girl was killed and a number of others were molested in the Colorado attack.

In the widespread coverage that followed these crimes, very little was made of the fact that only girls were targeted. Imagine if a gunman had gone into a school, separated the kids up on the basis of race or religion, and then shot only the black kids. Or only the white kids. Or only the Jews.

There would have been thunderous outrage. The country would have first recoiled in horror, and then mobilized in an effort to eradicate that kind of murderous bigotry. There would have been calls for action and reflection. And the attack would have been seen for what it really was: a hate crime.

Read, ponder, discuss...

Assorted assholes

Wow, am I ever on a tear!

This whole Mark Foley thing is appalling to me, but even more appalling is the apparent attempt to cover up the whole thing by the Republicans.  These are a lot of the same guys who went ape shit on Clinton over the whole Lewinsky thing.  To them I say, "At least Monica was legal, you morons."

On a more serious note, I volunteered for CASA when I was living in Missouri.  If you don't know, CASA stands for Court-Appointed Special Advocates.  As a CASA volunteer, it was my duty to represent the rights of abused and neglected children in court.  I saw and dealt with some pretty horrific things, including two little girls (ages 4 and 6) who had been sexually molested by their father (after he had gotten their mother hooked on meth.)  I also met a four year old boy whose bipolar mother was dating a guy with a hair-trigger temper, and when mom was off her meds and in a major depressive episode, the bf just couldn't deal with an active four-year-old.  The child's grandparents took out a restraining order against the bf on the kid's behalf.  In both cases, it was up to me to recommend to the judge what was in the best interests of these poor children.

So when I read about an adult who uses his power and influence to sexually exploit minors, I get more than just a little pissed off.  I have seen, firsthand, what happens when children are abused and exploited, and I'm shocked not only by Rep. Foley's behavior, but also by the manner in which his Republican friends appear to have tried to cover it up.  There's no excuse for this kind of garbage.

And don't even get me started on the recent school shootings, in which young girls were victimized by half-cocked men.  A recent post on feministing.com exposes the underlying misogyny in these attacks.  Once again, anyone who thinks the feminist movement is dead or useless needs their fucking head examined.

You Nazi cow

The crazy-ass conservative soccer moms are at it again.  This time, it's some beyotch down in Georgia (just a little ways from me) who is trying to get the Harry Potter books banned from the school libraries in Gwinnett County on account of the fact that they supposedly advocate witchcraft.

Oh, please.

I'm reminded of my favorite scene in Field of Dreams when Amy Madigan's character takes on the book-burning beyotch at the PTA.  "Step outside, you Nazi cow!"

News flash: Harry Potter's been around for years now.  J.K. Rowling is almost finished with the series.  Have we seen legions of young readers turning to witchcraft, devil-worship, and all those other horrible, horrible things that the Nazi cows are afraid of?  I don't fucking think so.  Get bent, Laura Mallory.

More boiling blood

I found this account via feministing.com, a great feminist blog that I read regularly.  It's about a woman's attempt to get a prescription for emergency contraception, also known as Plan B or the morning-after pill.  Needless to say, I was livid after I finished reading it.

Anyone who thinks that the feminist movement is "over" or "tired" or "irrelevant," or just a bunch of man-hating bitches who need an excuse to become lesbians or something ridiculous like that should take a look at this article.  As long as there are self-righteous people (male and female) trying to keep us from controlling our own bodies, we'll be around to fight back. 

I wonder what would happen if a female doctor refused to prescribe Viagra for a single guy because she had a "moral objection" to the fact that he would most likely go out and fuck everything with two tits and a pulse?

Grr.

I leave you with one of my favorite slogans:

Because woman's work is never done
and is underpaid or unpaid or boring or
repetitious and we're the first to get fired
and what we look like is more important
than what we do and if we get raped it's
our fault and if we get beaten we must have
provoked it and if we raise our voices we're
nagging bitches and if we enjoy sex we're
nymphos and if we don't we're frigid and if
we ask our doctors too many
questions, we're neurotic and/or pushy and
if we expect childcare we're selfish and if we
stand up for our rights we're aggressive and
"unfeminine" and if we don't we're typical
weak females and if we want to get married
we're out to trap a man and if we don't we're
unnatural and because we still can't get
adequate safe contraception but man can walk
on the moon and... for lots and lots
of other reasons, we are part of the
women's liberation movement.

Rest in Peace, Ann.

Texas -- and the U.S. -- lost a great woman today.  Even George W. Bush had the decency to say, "Texas has lost one of its great daughters."

And I have no doubt that, up in heaven, she came up with a sharp, snappy retort after hearing him say it. :)

Solving the worst kind of mystery

My copy of the latest issue of Bust came in the mail yesterday, but I didn't have a chance to sit down and read it until this morning.  Cup of coffee in hand, I perused its pages, reading with particular interest an article by Cathy Belben about her desire to donate her body after she dies to the "Body Farm," also known as the Anthropological Research Facility at the Uniersity of Tennessee.  According to the article, the "Body Farm" is

where forensic research is conducted that has been used to solve homicides around the world and train FBI agents.  Students at the Body Farm investigate the impact of the elements on corpses to figure out how factors like insect activity... and flesh putrefaction can solve crimes.  And how is such research conducted?  It all starts with test subjects -- unidentified or donated cadavers -- that are strewn on the ground, submurged in murky ponds, stuffed in suitcases and trunks, hung from gallows, or buried in shallow graves and later studied by earnest learners in protective clothing.

Sounds a little disgusting, I know, but I thought it was interesting.  Like the author, I have more than a passing interest in unsolved murders, and I'm fascinated by the different investigative techniques that are used to help identify victims and track down their killers.  Unlike the author, though, I don't usually watch CSI. 

The new movie about the infamous Black Dahlia murder, as well as Hollywoodland (about the mysterious death of George Reeves) are both high on my must-see list, however.  Maybe I'm fascinated by this stuff because my favorite aunt was a police officer, or because a girl I went to school with, along with her entire family, was murdered senselessly nearly ten years ago (their deaths were solved, fortunately, but the days following the killings were terrifying when no one knew who had done it or why.)

When I was still probably way too young to watch it, I tuned in regularly to Unsolved Mysteries and I still enjoy catching it in syndication when I can.  The stories about people who disappeared or whose deaths were unexplained always fascinated me.  I suppose part of it is that morbid curiosity that keeps us from looking away when we pass the scene of a car wreck, but part of it was something else, too.  I mourned for these people, especially those whose killers were never caught, or whose bodies were never identified.

A few years ago, while researching something on the internet, I stumbled across (completely by accident) a news item about a young woman whose body was found in a cornfield near Racine, Wisconsin.  The article included a reconstruction of her face.  She had been tortured before she was ultimately beaten to death and her body dumped.  This was in 1999, and she still has not been indentified.  Her killers haven't been found, either.  Ever since I read about the "Racine Jane Doe," I have been haunted by her story.  I hope someday someone recognizes her or comes forward with information about who took her life.

Justice, finally

I was relieved to read in the news today that Andrea Yates was finally found not guilty by reason of insanity for the murders of her children.  From the very beginning, I never thought she could possibly have known that drowning her children was wrong.  Everything I read about her, her life, and the case suggested to me that she was a woman suffering from severe mental illness, not a cold, calculating killer who decided over a bowl of cereal one morning that she was going to drown her kids one by one.

I was furious when the first jury found her guilty, and even more furious when I learned that one of the prosecution's witnesses had lied on the stand.  Park Dietz's lies led to her conviction the first time around.

Everyone's favorite man's man can't get it up!

I had to laugh when I read this tidbit this morning.  I lived in Rush's hometown for two years so I figure I've got the right to make fun of him a little.

I guess now we know why he's such a blowhard, eh?  Compensating for something, there, Rushie?

I read that they confiscated the Viagra after detaining him, too.  Looks like Ann Coulter isn't going to be getting any for awhile.

<chortle>

Kids

I have to preface this post by saying that I am not a parent (yet).  I would like to be one someday, and I have plenty of ideas about how I would raise my child(ren), but I am far from an expert.  (I have to admit that "parenting" two rambunctious kitties sometimes feels a little like I imagine parenting children would feel, but I'm not deluded enough to think that it's the same thing.)

I found this article yesterday on MSNBC... it deals with the issue of unruly children in public places.  Is it OK for restaurants and other establishments to require parents to enforce a minimum standard of behavior with their children?  Or is it tyranny?  I can understand both sides of the issue -- sometimes even the "best" parent is rendered helpless by a child who is having the mother of all meltdowns... it happens, it's understandable, and I sympathize with parents whose kids are giving them a harder time than they deserve.  On the other hand, though, I also sympathize with people eating in restaurants, staying in hotels, etc. who are disturbed by the obnoxious behavior of out-of-control kids whose parents can't (or won't) even make an effort to enforce the rules or remove the child from the situation.

I once stayed at a hotel in Memphis, TN that was hosting some sort of child-friendly convention or competition (I can't remember what it was, exactly, but it was definitely kid-oriented.)  There were lots of families with children staying in the hotel, but despite the air of busy-ness and activity, everything seemed relatively orderly.  When night fell and my husband and I -- exhausted from a busy day -- settled into our comfy bed in our well-appointed hotel room, we discovered, much to our chagrin, that our younger neighbors weren't the least bit sleepy.  We spent the next hour and a half listening to the following things: the blare of the television in the room next door, accompanied by unmistakably kid-like shrieks, shouts, and giggles; the sounds of little feet gallumphing up and down the hallway outside our room; the spastically dinging elevator as it was ridden up and down like a carnival ride; the slamming of assorted doors.... the list goes on.

Duh! That's why they call it the Ladies' Room!!!!

And all you men wonder why women go to the restroom in pairs....

All I can say is that my girls over at Saturday Night Live better find some way to work this into the Weekend Update!

I nearly died when I read this story.  I almost couldn't believe it was true, considering how rife it was with elements of stereotypical male sex fantasy... hot cheerleaders having sex together in a restroom stall, getting into a dustup on the way out, getting arrested.  I have to know: is NBC Sports run by teenage boys?

Nothing like a little hot girl-on-girl action to brighten up your day.

Could someone please tell me why this is newsworthy?

Katrina relief of a different stripe

I saw a news item the other night about people who were separated from their pets in the wake of Hurricane Katrina, and I started bawling like a baby at the sight of both the people who had lost their beloved companions and the animals who had lost their people.  I kept thinking about our two cats and how horrible it would be to have to leave them behind in a disaster situation.

The news story also had some information about various organizations that are trying to shelter the homeless animals, and, when possible, reunite them with their owners.  Louisiana State University's veterinary school has set up an emergency shelter and they are accepting donations.  You can read more about what they are doing here.  Monies contributed will go directly toward animal care or support of the veterinarians trying to help said animals.  I'm writing my check today.

Thank you, Frank

Falluja Floods the Superdome - New York Times

Above is a link to another great piece by Frank Rich regarding the federal government's abysmal response in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.  The right wingers can try to spin it all they want, but the bottom line is that the system FAILED.  No amount of bullshit will ever fully conceal that fact.

And if Bush's approval ratings are any indication, people are (to quote the film Network) mad as hell and not going to take it anymore.

It's about damn time.

A voice from New Orleans

My husband sent me the link to this blog on Friday morning, when the situation in New Orleans was looking particularly grim.  It provides an excellent account of what is going on there and the entries are at once very powerful, extremely interesting, and shocking and saddening, too.

I have yet to make a donation to any of the relief efforts, but will be doing so soon.  I want to research the options and find an organization or organizations that will use as much of my money as possible for actual relief efforts.  I heard that something like 60% of what is given to the Red Cross goes to overhead.  Right now, I'm leaning toward UMCOR (The United Methodist Committee on Relief.)  I'm a lapsed Methodist, but one thing I still appreciate about them is their unflappable commitment to helping those in need.  Plus 100% of my contribution will be used to aid the relief effort.

In light of the rather slow and crappy response from the governement, groups like UMCOR, the Red Cross, and countless others need our support.  Another way to help is to visit Hurricane Housing, where you can offer housing for people displaced by the storm.  If you have a guest room, sign up!

At least the termites are drowning

I have never been to New Orleans.  When my husband and I were living in southeastern Missouri, we were a day's drive away, but we never got down there.  I have wanted to go there for as long as I can remember.  I'm sure that one day I'll go (there's a professional conference there in December that I'd like to attend) but I doubt the New Orleans I see will resemble what it used to be.

On Monday morning, I was off from work and I found myself spending large chunks of my last vacation day glued to CNN and praying for New Orleans and the other areas in the path of Katrina.  Then, today at noon I heard on the radio that some of the levees had failed and that Lake Pontchartrain was overflowing.  Amazing how a hurricane's greatest devastation can occur after the storm itself has passed.  And now there is looting in the French Quarter, people stranded on rooftops, and an unknowable number (at least at this point) of people who did not survive.

May the city regenerate, may her citizens find strength and comfort, and may "les bon temps roulez" once again.

Go Cindy

Cindy Sheehan is my new hero.  The strength and tenacity she's shown by camping out in Crawford until the Shrub agrees to take a meeting with her is admirable.  I love this woman.  My heart aches for the loss of her son, Casey, and I firmly believe that Cindy, like all of us, deserves an answer from Mr. Bush about what exactly it was that her son and his fellow soldiers gave their lives for.  She is in my thoughts daily... I wish I could go to Crawford myself and keep her company.

Frank Rich had a smashing piece about the war in the New York Times yesterday... well-worth reading.  I love Frank Rich, but pieces like this make me love him even more.

Say a prayer for Cindy tonight.  She is a hero.

Amusement parks & safety

The recent death of Daudi Bamuwamye while riding Mission: Space at Disney World's EPCOT Center got me thinking, researching, and questioning.  How safe are those amusement park and carnival rides I so dearly love?  I learned that the answer varies quite a bit, depending on whether the ride in question is a portable one that travels with a carnival, or a stationary ride that lives at an amusement park.  It also depends on where the ride is located, for each state has different laws governing inspection and maintenance of amusement rides.  Check out www.saferparks.org for an excellent overview of what is currently being done and where the gaps are.

Someone my husband knows was telling me about Mission: Space not too long ago.  He mentioned that each rider has a computer monitor in front of him or her (for each rider has a "job" to do during the course of the simulated mission, although if you don't do your job the computer will do it for you.)  He then went on to warn me about what would happen if you took your eyes off the monitor during the ride: "instant sick."  I guess being in a centrifuge can do that to a person.  When I was younger, I loved centrifugal force rides like Gravitrons and Round-Ups, but now they make me ill.  I can't really stand any ride that spins anymore, with the exception of Octopus-type rides and Scramblers -- and even those make me queasy if the operator lets the ride last a little longer than it's supposed to.  I was also somewhat disturbed after reading this article about Mission: Space.  If Disney really did not permit the company that designed it to complete their safety tests, that is definitely bad.  Needless to say, you won't catch me riding it anytime soon.

In case you were wondering, I linked to the Flat Joint a couple of times during this post -- it's a great database of almost every type of flat ride imaginable.  I enjoy paging through it and looking at all the rides I've been on, as well as identifying ones I'd like to try (or avoid!) in the future.

Unbelievable

When it comes to reading the morning paper, I have a tendency to skim.  Most of the front section stories are AP wire stories that I've already read online or heard about on the radio, so I breeze through them pretty quickly.  I read the Local section fairly religiously, particularly the police blotter (to see who's been shot recently in our neighborhood) and the local columnists.  I also pause at the Opinion page because there is almost always something interesting, thought-provoking, humorous, or blood-boiling to be found there.  (Plus the Morning Call has quite a knack for picking entertaining editorial cartoons.)  Then it's on to the "A.M. Magazine" section to read my favorite comics and advice columns.

Every so often, though, there's a front-page story that hooks me from the headline, and I have to stop and read it.  My coffee gets cold, my cereal gets soggy, and I realize all of a sudden that my husband has left the table and jumped in the shower without me even noticing.  I can recall once getting so into one particular investigative piece that it made me late for work.

I came across another intriguing article just last week.  (Fortunately, this one was short and did not cause me to be late.)  It was a story about a Persian Gulf War vet who was asked to speak at a Memorial Day ceremony in Coopersburg, PA, a small town not far from Allentown.  At the outset, it doesn't sound like a terribly exciting story, but then you read further.  It seems our veteran plagiarized his remarks from something he found on the internet -- and rather than just borrowing a few phrases here and there, he read the whole thing verbatim to the assembled crowd.  Apparently, this was the first time he had read the speech all the way through, because, as it turned out, it was chock-full of racial and anti-Semitic slurs.  (The original author of the speech was some crazy-ass white supremacist militant, and the speaker didn't know that.)

Say it with me now: "D'OH!"

You can read the article here.  It's a head-shaker, to be sure.

Speaking of plagiarism, the best man at our wedding plagiarized his toast from a "Best Man" website.  Granted, the site itself encouraged best men who were stuck for a speech to go ahead and steal from them, but I still thought it was unbelievably tacky for our best man to take this route.  Slacker.  (In case you were wondering, in his speech he utilized Intro #1, Content #2, and by the time he got to the Closing I was so insulted that I don't even remember what he used there.  At least the speech he used wasn't full of ethnic slurs, so I guess there is a bright side to everything.)

Interestingly, less than a year after we got married, our friendship with our best man ended very badly.  It had nothing to do with the toast (I'm not that much of a bitch) but rather with some much more serious issues I won't delve into here.  In hindsight, though, I realize that that plagiarized toast was a harbinger of the kind of lousy friend he would turn out to be.

I guess the lesson here is twofold: 1.) It's a bad idea to plagiarize and make yourself look like an ass in front of important people, and 2.) If you have a friend who regularly plagiarizes things, that could be a sign of future "bad friend behavior," so you best watch your back.

Thinking about Natalee

Unless you've been asleep for the past couple of weeks, you've been privy to the almost round-the-clock news coverage of the disappearance of Natalee Holloway while on a senior trip in Aruba.  As of this writing, she has not yet been located, nor have we learned any more details about the "something bad" that allegedly happened to her the night she disappeared.  I can only imagine how distraught her family is, because each day that passes decreases the likelihood that Ms. Holloway will be found alive.  My heart goes out to them.

This case has gotten me thinking back to my own high school days, particularly those last weeks leading up to graduation.  I attended a mostly white, suburban high school outside of Seattle.  There were about 1,000 students at my high school, and I can say with certainty that the education I received there stood me in good stead when I started college in the fall of 1994.

I was not popular in high school.  I participated in a couple of activities and I had a small circle of friends (most of whom were either a year or two ahead or a year or two behind me), and I had exactly one boyfriend for a period of about six months.  (He went to another school.)  I was never asked to any dances, and I didn't play any sports.  (P.E. was, without a doubt, my worst subject.  I am convinced that there is a special place in hell for sadistic gym teachers.)  I don't mention all of this to try to evoke sympathy -- believe me, I made my peace with high school a long time ago.  Rather, I'm bringing it up to give you a sense of the kind of kid I was back then.

My recollections of those last few days of high school are somewhat dim... I remember taking my exams, the graduation ceremony, the all-night PTA-sponsored graduation night party, signing yearbooks, and starting to think about which college dorm I wanted to live in and what I was going to take from my room at home when I went off to school.  I also remember watching the now-infamous O.J. Simpson white Bronco chase as it unfolded on our living room television.

I can recall hearing about senior skip day (which I didn't participate in) and about possibilities for various senior trips.  I had no interest in going on a senior trip because I knew that none of my close friends would be going, plus I was not into partying and drinking the way that my peers were.  Even if I had wanted to go, I know my parents would not have permitted it.  They were not terribly conservative parents, and they allowed me quite a bit of leeway as far as personal freedom was concerned, but I think they knew on some level that teenagers don't always exercise good judgement.  (I certainly had my moments, despite having been a generally good kid.)

Looking back, I am glad I had some rules to follow during those ultra-sensitive teenage years.  Family therapists often talk about the paradox of adolescence: a young person learning how to become an adult requires both freedom and boundaries, to be treated like an adult and yet, at times, like a child, too.  I'm grateful that my parents took the responsibility seriously.  In theory at least, they probably saved my life a time or two.

I'm not trying to say that Natalee Holloway's parents -- or anyone else's parents, for that matter -- were irresponsible or otherwise "bad parents."  I don't know them and I don't know how Natalee was raised.  But the fact remains that she made a poor choice the night before she was to fly home to Alabama.  Even the most responsible teenager can fall victim to peer pressure or make a bad decision -- it all comes down to a comparative lack of life experience, and no amount of parenting ("good" or "bad") can stop that.  Today, at age 29, I look back at some of the things I choose to do when I was younger and I cringe.

I wonder where Natalee's friends were when she was preparing to leave the bar with those three young guys, or, better yet, where the seven chaperones that accompanied the kids on the trip were?  I can't claim to know the full story (none of us do at this point), but if there is one lesson that I think we can take away from this misfortune, it's that we all have our moments of clouded judgement and faulty thinking, so it's probably a good idea to keep the number of a good friend, parent, shrink, or sibling on speed dial.  Natalee did the same thing that all of us have done at one point or another, but the tragedy is that she may have paid for it with her life.

Life on 89 cents a day

Morning Call columnist Bill White's follow-up to his Saturday column appeared in this morning's edition, so I thought I would post the link.  In this column, he details his experience taking the Food Frugality Challenge, which was sponsored by the Second Harvest Food Bank of the Lehigh Valley and the Community Action Corporation of the Lehigh Valley.  In so doing, he experienced what it was like to live on a food budget of 89 cents per person per meal, which is the average food stamp allocation in Pennsylvania.

I learned a number of things from reading about his experience:

1.) People who receive food stamps cannot afford to buy healthy foods, such as fresh fruits and vegetables or high quality meats (chicken breasts, lean beef, fish, etc.)  As a result, they have to purchase and eat foods that are high in calories and fat and low in nutritional value.  As Mr. White put it, " Our country's obesity problem isn't just about rich suburban kids. It's also about people who lack the income for a balanced, nutritious diet."  I know for a fact that this is even more of a problem in urban areas.  When my husband and I lived in West Philadelphia, we had a difficult time finding a grocery store near us that even carried decent produce.  There was a grocery store across the street from our apartment building, but when you walked into it you were knocked over by the terrible odor eminating from the place, and stunned by the lack of produce and other fresh items.  (Even the freshness of the pre-packaged items was questionable.)  And yet for a lot of the people living in our neighborhood, this grocery store was the only option.

2.) The mean-spirited conservatives who go around kvetching about welfare recipients living high on the hog deserve to be bitch-slapped.  Someone who is receiving food stamps simply cannot buy expensive food items.  They can't even afford fresh produce!  When I lived in southeastern Missouri, I saw this attitude a lot -- people who were downright convinced that people who received public assistance of some type (Medicaid, food stamps, etc.) were somehow making big bucks off the backs of our tax dollars.  While I am sure that there are people who do abuse the system, I am also sure that the vast majority do not.

3.) It's time to increase the minimum wage in this country to a living wage.  Pennsylvania defers to the federal standard of $5.15 per hour.  In Washington state, it's now $7.35, which is a little better, but not much.  Washington also reviews and adjusts the minimum wage for inflation each year, which is good.  I'm still floored, though, that when I took my first real summer job in 1993 (working at a movie theatre), I started out making the minimum wage at the time, which was $4.25.  Later that summer, it increased to $4.90.  And now, in most parts of the country, it is still only 25 cents (that's a shiny state quarter, people) higher than what it was when I was a senior in high school.  Can someone please explain this logic to me?

Tomorrow is National Hunger Awareness Day.  I am including a link to the official site, where you can find information on events in your area, as well as ideas for ways to get involved in fighting hunger in your own community.  I will probably send a few letters to my elected representatives and make a donation or two.  I also read a suggestion to skip lunch tomorrow and donate the money you would have spent on it (around $5 for me) to a food bank or shelter, so I might do that as well.

Whatever I decide to do, I know that tomorrow will also be a day for me to reflect on how fortunate I have been in my life.  My hubby and I have been through our share of lean times (plus we're in debt up to our eyeballs with a mortgage, car payment, credit cards, and student loans) but not once in our life together have we had to go without a meal or choose between necessities.  I know there are people out there for whom the aforementioned problems are daily companions.  It is my hope that one day there will be enough of us out there who are aware and angered by this situation that we can form a critical mass of resistance and awareness and -- finally -- put a stop to it.

The working poor

I am not ashamed to admit that I am a liberal democrat.  I gave money to and vociferously supported Howard Dean before his campaign imploded in Iowa last January, and when Kerry became the front runner, I supported him as well.  I was tempted to put a bumper sticker on my car in the wake of the 2004 election that read, "Bush has blood on his hands.  If you voted for him, you do too!" but my car already gets vandalized enough as it is.  I do, however, own and proudly wear an "I did not vote 4 Bush" rubber bracelet.  (If you're of the same mind, you can get yourself one here.)

Anyway, given my politics I am used to hearing the standard diatribes from the right wing, and one right wing diatribe that particularly irks me is the constant complaint about how welfare recipients are all a bunch of lazy freeloaders that our tax dollars are supporting.  I can deal with most right wing vitriol pretty well, but the comments about people on welfare really stick in my craw for some reason.  Well, in this morning's paper, one of our local columnists wrote about this very issue.  I'm including a link to the article because I thought it was very good and something that needs to be read outside the greater Lehigh Valley area.  Enjoy.

P.S.  Not long after I typed the sentence about my car getting vandalized, a cop showed up at our front door to let us know that some drunken idiot had sideswiped my car last night.  Ripped the driver's side mirror clean off (the same mirror I paid to have replaced a few months ago after a snow plow hit it.)  I can't even get the driver's side door open, now... that's how badly it's been dented.  My karma must be seriously in the can or something.